What You Were in the Past Does not Define Who You Are or What You Will Be!

Okay recently I have decided to delete all my entire posts in the past and rewrite my blog. It has been difficult to spend some times writing a new post to be honest. Working in long hours plus other voluntary commitments are pretty much the story of my life :D

Many people know me as a musically-gifted person who can play most simple songs by ears (cannot emphasise the word simple here haha). I count myself extremely blessed with this talent but I would never imagine I would be in this position when I was a little kid.

I was born in family with virtually zero music background in big family from both my dad's and mom's side. In fact, I am the only male who can play any musical instruments in my generation among my cousins :P

Long time ago, though, when I was in Primary School to be exact, I once was a shy boy who cried every single time I took compulsory singing exam at school. I suffered from major stage fright and was so nervous that I always ended up in tears while singing and afterwards. My friends and teacher often mocked me and it did not help my confidence. It was not until I learnt to play musical instrument called "Pianika" because it was compulsory to choose an instrument during Year 7 when my mom discovered that I could hear the melodies of simple songs and play them immediately. She then enrolled me into an Organ lesson near my house with zero expectation. I remember she said "give it a try. If you like it then you can keep taking the lesson but if not you can quit anytime".

I quickly climbed up the Step (or Grade in piano lesson) and reached Step 7 in 2 years while completing Step 5 exam till that date. Normally it would take about 6 months to complete each step so obviously I learnt fast. Since higher grade required more learning, I did not enjoy the pressure and decided to quit after about 2 years but I promised myself to keep playing simply because I enjoyed it.

I then moved to Perth in 2006 to study and there was a electronic piano in my homestay house. Intrigued, I decided to learn by myself and it was a huge struggle in the beginning for my left hand because it was more flowing in piano than in organ. Thanks to my basketball addiction, my left hand is actually pretty good for a right-handed person (my eldest bro is left-handed). I joined a choir in Perth, and it was around 2010 when my friend asked me to learn to be the choir accompanist.

It was a struggle initially but my friend kept supporting me saying "it is a matter of practice and experience, you will eventually get it". She proved to be right, I have been the accompanist till date and still enjoy it. Even more, in November 2014 I met several teen-aged girls and boys and decided to organise a choir for them (some people say I'm their teacher but I don't really teach them, simply choose the songs and arrange practice for them). I also have sparingly taught few people how to accompany (again I usually give tips so I'm reluctant to say it is a teaching but whatever LOL)

I thank God because I am gifted with ultra-sensitive ears and sometimes I can learn how to play a song simply by watching someone else live or even a Youtube video. I recognised the "pattern" of most simple songs on my own. In fact my friends have said "what you learnt on your own may take years for others so obviously you're one of those rare breeds". Still, plenty of people are miles better than I am :D

At one point this year, though, I looked back at myself about 16-18 years ago

I was shy
I was crying in front of my classmates and teacher
I suffered from major stage fright
My friends and teacher often made fun of me crying in front of the class. "Big boys shouldn't cry" is what I remembered most
My family has zero music background, not that I blame them but music is simply not in our blood

And then I look at myself at the moment

I have performed in 4 choral concerts in my choir (2007, 2009, 2013, 2015)
I play accompaniment in my church at least 2 times per month. My friends once joked "you look like a single pianist out there" (no offense to other accompanists)
I teach a teen-aged choir. For real, I'm teaching music LOL

I'd be lying if I said I would be in this position even 5-6 years ago

Now about yourself, have you ever been in my situation before?

I am sure all of us, yes ALL of us have been

When we're ready to give up
When we think we're not that good
When we think we have no talent
When our confidence hits a new low that we become hard on ourselves

It took me years for me to reach this point of my life and my advice to you is keep digging your talent and there must be one within you that may still yet be discovered

It's never too late to learn. Many of my friends learn music from young age (around 6-7 yo). I actually started relatively late (I was 13-yo)

And the best thing for me? I actually laughed at myself in the past

Laughed at myself crying
Laughed at myself being super shy in front of stage but now I love being on stage so much!

What you were in the past does not define who you are and what you will be

Don't be afraid to try!
Don't be afraid to make mistakes!
Don't be afraid to learn new things!

We all have our own talents!
Yes you do have your own! Believe me!

Dig inside, develop it and you'll be amazed by it

One day, you'll look back and learn to laugh at yourself, like I do :)